We quietly watch the star athlete make the final shot and score the winning goal or lead his team to a touchdown in the final minute of the game. We marvel at their talent and determination, but what we most appreciate and admire is the unparalleled confidence they display – they know they will succeed.
Confidence is a trait that is seductive, attractive, valuable, desirable, and contagious. Most people aspire to greater heights than he is, even if they feel confident most of the time. It is a trait that will help us achieve better results for ourselves and when leading others. Any trait with this much usefulness is a trait worth developing. And yes, you can develop and strengthen your self-confidence.
Consider these five steps the building blocks for more confidence in any part of your life.
1. Remind yourself of past successes. Confidence is built on past success. Because you’ve had success before, you can (and will) again. We boost our confidence in any activity when we look back on ourselves or remind ourselves of our past successes. If you’re trying to build confidence in a new field, past success can still help boost our confidence. For example, if you’ve had success doing something new in the past, look back on those experiences when you try something new—even if it’s in a completely different part of your life.
2. Read and listen to positive material. Fill your mind with positive and affirming words, thoughts, and stories. Read things that enhance your skills or knowledge in the field in which you want to build your confidence. Read uplifting and generally affirming articles, and read biographies of successful people. You will find that many of them have had problems in life, have come out of difficult situations and are still successful. If you’ve ever thought, “Well, if they could do it, so could I.” Then you realize that we can build our confidence by reading other people’s stories. Reading and listening to positive material is about reinforcement, encouragement, and learning. All three of these ingredients are essential for more confidence.
3. Look to your future success. Olympic athletes, corporate executives, and people who are successful in all kinds of endeavors imagine success in the future. Confidence will increase when we see ourselves succeed. Think about it, if you knew you were going to succeed, your confidence would go up, right? Envisioning future success does that very thing for us. Our mind cannot distinguish between something real and something clearly imagined. Visualize your success clearly. What will it look, smell and taste like after it has worked? Who will be with you, what will you hear and where will you be? How would you feel at that moment? Putting this much detail into your vivid image improves the likelihood of success and promotes greater confidence!
4. Reframe failure. Thomas Edison spent a lot of time trying to create an incandescent light bulb – to generate light from electricity. He is credited with saying, “I have not failed, I have discovered a thousand and one hundred items that do not work.” 1200! Perhaps you feel that you can reframe your failures as learning experiences — as an opportunity to see what doesn’t work. But will you be able to do it 1200 times? Know that failures will happen – and your confidence will not be shaken when they come. Use failures as a learning opportunity. Know that every failure brings you that much closer to success. When we reframe our failure as a learning experience, we reduce our fear and increase our confidence.
5. Take confident action. You wanted confidence to help you try and succeed in new ways, right? So get out there and get at it! You have to put your confidence on the line. You must exercise. And while you’re doing a job, make it confident to work! Remember that if you act confident you will be more confident. Review other steps you’ve taken to build your confidence. If you are heading towards a new action step, remind yourself of past successes again. Visualize the successful outcome again. Build your confidence every step of the way, but remember that it all must lead to action.
These Steps are a system for strengthening and building your confidence in any situation in life. Use these steps and I am sure you will be more confident.
